The Very Worst Thing

I have always thought that the worst thing about a long distance relationship is being apart from one another. And I’m sure that is the assumption most people would have. But as time has ticked on and mine and Shawn’s relationship continually evolves into something more serious each day, I have realised that it is in fact not the worst thing about our situation. You see, the distance between us can be closed. In fact we have already solved that issue; as of November 27th, there will be no more goodbyes. But there is one thing that cannot be altered, constantly pulling at my heart strings. And that is our families. Our families will never form a close bond or relationship. They will always be more of acquaintances to one another, and some parts of our extended family will never meet at all. This thought completely shatters my heart as family is something that both Shawn and I hold onto dearly.

As this realisation as hit me with more and more force as the months roll by, I’ve had a hard time coming to terms with it. There will be no family gatherings on the weekend, no joint family christmas’, birthdays, easter’s, or New Years. Our wedding one day will be a majority of either mine or Shawn’s side and a lot of people that one of us love and care for, won’t be able to attend. Our future children will be closer to one set of grandparents over the other and it will be hard to make trips back and forth all the time. These things are a constant concern and often put me down.

Throughout this year, being with Shawn has been the most thrilling thing that’s ever happened to me and I wouldn’t take any of it back for the world. But at times I find myself, not wishing, but only wondering what it would be like if we had been in a regular relationship from the start. To have both our families close by, for us both to be familiar with the area in which we live. But, in saying all of that, we both love having an interesting, irregular history and we have a strong lust for adventure and to set ourselves apart. And it is for these reasons, and so many more, that I can confidently say that I wouldn’t have our relationship any other way. Our families being so distant from one another is extremely hard, yes. But! I love Shawn. And I love every single challenge we have to face together because no matter what, we always come out stronger and more in love at the end.

Screen shot 2013-10-08 at 1.48.29 PM Screen shot 2013-10-08 at 1.51.50 PM Screen shot 2013-10-08 at 1.53.39 PM Screen shot 2013-10-08 at 1.59.56 PM Screen shot 2013-10-08 at 2.09.46 PMScreen shot 2013-10-08 at 2.06.04 PMThese are some screen shots of a Vlog Caleb made from a hike we did up to Lake 22 in April. I’ll post the video on here later if anyone is interested in seeing more of what we got up to that day!


2 thoughts on “The Very Worst Thing

  1. You guys are really strong, I’m glad you finally will be together even I don’t know you. I have long-distance relationship too and it’s really hard, so I understand you. The hardest thing me and my boyfriend realised is that we are going to say “goodbye” to each other at least three more years.
    And Ellie, you really inpire me, I like your blog very much.
    P.S. Please don’t condemn my English, it’s not my native language (Russian and Latvian are 🙂 )

  2. Family division is hard but you make the best out of it. At least with the current technology you can Skype the family you don’t see as often.

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