My belief is that everything happens for a reason. Whether that reason is visible to you or not doesn’t change the reality of it. Each of our lives are apart of a much larger scheme, they are drawn into the complex plan God has for the earth and all of mankind. If only we could take a step back once in awhile from our own selfish thoughts and worries and be able to appreciate that concept. I know I am constantly guilty of revolving my days around myself instead of others. A comforting thought I like to remind myself of is that there IS a bigger picture. And even though parts of our lives may seem uncertain and unstable at times, it all fits perfectly into the will of our Father which is always for us, never against us.
When I came to England, I had no idea what to expect or where this journey would take me, but I held some hopes of being able to travel Europe close to my heart. Of course, our plans never come to play out how we imagine them. This is because we can only see what is directly in front of us, while God sees what is all around. The past, the present, the future. Everything. He eliminates the barrier of time from his vision.
I’ve been away from home for three months now and I think I’ve spent more time in the United States than I have traveling Europe. I’m completely out of money, once again, and fail to see anyway of exploring hidden European countries like I had hoped. But, I don’t regret any decisions I’ve made. I haven’t wasted money, only buying what is necessary and making sure my relationship with Shawn is well looked after by using any spare cash to see him.
God is doing things with my heart, which I can’t quite make out just yet. The details of my purpose is still unclear. And the reason for me being in the UK is also unclear. But what is clear, is the constant soothing voice that echoes through my ears each morning, whispering, “trust me, child.“
The Lord will unfold his plans for you at the exact moment we need to know them. So in the times that you are unsure of yourself or your journey, know that your purpose or your next season will be revealed at a divine time. And that where you are in life right at this minute, is perfect. I have had to remind myself of this over and over. But once I do, and take a deep breath, I feel peace.
I miss home in Australia a lot. So much, in fact, that I find myself fantasising about returning as soon as possible. But then I think it would be almost pathetic to give up on this dream I had to live over here. I questioned this to God many times, but kept getting the same answer: “I will place you where I need you, when I need you there.” So I suppose one day I will look back on this time I’ve spent in England, connect the dots and have an epiphany of why it all came into place as it did. Until then I am trusting, believing and soaking up the experience as best I can. With the exception of a few days of feeling hopeless and totally depressed (but hey, I’m only human right!)
Some things I can be sure I’ve taken from the experience of living abroad already are:
- Independence – if I want dinner, I actually have to go and buy the ingredients and cook it myself.
- Organisation skills – I suddenly have bills to pay, car troubles to deal with on my own, as well keeping documents together etc etc.
- Learning to appreciate what I had – Australia seems so much more appealing now. I was so restless before I left, maybe this was God’s way of helping me to appreciate what had been given to me. Taking a step away can be such an eye opening experience.
- The struggles of a different culture – they do things very differently over here and it’s been hard to adapt to a lot of it. Especially the cost of living!!!
- Being slightly closer to my boyfriend – definitely a bonus! We were able to do some travelling together to a few countries and also have made two trips to the states.
I’m sure that list will continue to grow as time goes on and my view is made clearer once I’ve stepped back. Missing all my family and friends tremendously but knowing they are just a plane ticket away is comforting. Hope to see you soon Australia!