Things are never what they seem. Such a common expression, yet we don’t take it seriously unless we experience it first hand. At least that’s what I’ve found. I moved to England around two months ago and what I envisioned this experience to be has certainly proven to be far from reality. But I suppose that is always the way. We’re not fortune tellers are we? We can create an idea in our minds of what makes sense to us and expect that for our future, but really, who are we to predict such complex agendas for ourselves?
When I was first given the opportunity to move so close to Europe, my mind hastily began reeling through scenes of endless summer trips to the Greek Isles, Tuscany, Portugal, Croatia and all the tiny countries I didn’t know existed. And then once summer was done, I would head up to Scandinavia and watch the world turn from green to red and orange. Once the snow began to fall I would take a trip through Poland and Germany and Switzerland. I would work for awhile, save as much as I could and then travel for a few weeks. Come home, work for a couple of months, then travel. And repeat. I had to stop myself there. Too much excitement for my shaking body to handle.
Well, that’s enough fantasising. Let’s get to the reality of it all. Apparently, and I wasn’t warned of this, England is in some kind of recession at the moment. They have taxes on everything and petrol is double the price as back home. As well as insurance, and public transport and even collecting parcels. Yes, I just paid thirty three pound to pick up a parcel of summer clothes sent from home, which is probably more than they are worth put together considering they were all thrifted. And on top of that, I doubt I’ll have a chance to wear them as it’s currently the middle of summer, fourteen degrees (celsius) and raining. Yes, I am so aware of how solum and pessimistic I am sounding right now. But I promise you would be feeling the same if you hadn’t seen a full day of sun in over a month. I also realise that I cannot expect to be feeling settled after only two months of being in an entirely new country, but I at least hoped to have some steady work and maybe a few friends. I did have one friend, but she left. For Sydney, of course. I think I’m fairly close to having another one though. I’ve been over to her place for tea twice now, so that’s looking hopeful.
I’d like to believe this whole experience of me being so far form everything I know, is character building. If I am learning important lessons and taking on new honourable attributes throughout this time, I will be thankful. I am also now beginning to see how selfish all that fantasying of travelling was. I want my life to have a bigger purpose than simply filling my own selfish desires.
I really want to wrap this post up with a positive spin. So, I’ll say this: my loving, heavenly father has not forgotten or forsaken me. I am reminded of this every page I turn in my Bible. And he has a reason, and a brilliant one at that, for my being here. So, with that knowledge I can have peace and hope for what’s to come. There, if that’s not a positive end to the post, I don’t know what would be!